Another day has come and gone. I have spent countless hours worrying about what my future holds. Knowing I can’t change one single thing by worrying, never the less, I continue to open the door every time the enemy knocks. If I’m honest, I don’t know the last time I genuinely smiled or felt joy. My new normal has flooded my mind with fear, and I’m finding myself wrestling with the TRUTH that has the power to set me free. It’s impossible to move forward when the past is holding you hostage.
If there’s one thing I’ve learned, no matter how much you plan, you never plan on tragedy and unwanted circumstances showing up at your door. Nothing prepares you for death, divorce or deception.
I know it’s time to let go of the past, and embrace my new reality. The hardest part of letting go is choosing to remember no more. I struggle with forgiving the offenses of the past. I find myself mulling through the garbage and listening to the devil whisper, “oh, you missed that piece of trash!” I have wasted far too many days worrying about the uncertainty of my future. The enemy has a way of using two small words to plant a heart full of doubt. “What If” God doesn’t show up? “What If” the bank account runs dry? “What if” they never change or say, “I’m sorry?” “What If” all your worst fears are confirmed?
I don’t know one person that truly knows what’s in store for tomorrow. And it’s funny, that as much as we “think” we are in control, we go into sheer panic as if God has left the building when circumstances don’t turn out the way we thought they should.
But I got to thinking…
“What if” God showed up and did the unthinkable? “What if” God used all those things the enemy meant for our destruction to propel us to greater things for his kingdom? And “what if” everyday we, as HIS children, expected plenty instead of a drought? How would this change our way of living?
I want so desperately to believe these truths; that God WILL “work all things together for my good” no matter how bad it appears, OR that “He CAN do exceedingly abundantly all that I can ask or imagine“ regardless of the circumstances I face. I want to grab hold of what the prophet Isaiah revealed to the people of Israel: “This is what the Lord says-he who made a way through the sea, a path through the mighty waters, who drew out the chariots and horses, the army and reinforcements together, and they lay there, never to rise again, extinguished, snuffed out like a wick: “Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the desert and streams in the wasteland.” Isaiah 43:16-19
I spend my days pouring into the lives of teenagers-many that are struggling emotionally and are in desperate need of love and attention, and I believe with ALL my heart that God has the power to heal every one of those hurting souls. I speak life to all those I encounter, but when it comes to my aching heart, I struggle to believe that God is good and still has a plan-a good plan, “to prosper me and not to harm me; a plan to give me a hope and a future.” I continue to agree with the lies of the enemy, rather than wrap ever fiber of my being around the truth of God’s word. I allow guilt, shame and condemnation to overshadow God’s banner of love.
Life is full of unseen twists and turns, so why should it come as a shock that if we live in a fallen world we are bound to see tragedy and evil lurking around waiting to devour God’s chosen ones?
It all comes down to one simple (but often HARD to do)…CHOICE. From the moment I get up until the moment I go to bed-I am faced with a series of choices. What will I wear, what will I eat, what will I watch on TV, what needs to be on my grocery list, –these choices don’t require much pondering. But then I am faced with the serious, deliberate, and on purpose (not matter how I feel) CHOICE-Who will I believe today? Will I agree with God, or will I agree with the enemy that wants to steal, kill and destroy me?
I haven’t been making the right choice lately, and maybe you too have been struggling to choose life. For some, choosing to believe God comes easy, and for some, (myself included) choosing to believe God when life has disappointed, becomes a major challenge. Jesus spoke to his disciples telling them, “If you hold to my teaching, you are really my disciples. Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.”
I know tomorrow will present it’s on set of problems and I will be tempted to wrestle with those two small but very powerful words, “what if.” But, TODAY I will CHOOSE to hold on to what God says is true…I am His child, he will never leave or forsake me, and he will make a way!
May we all choose to live a life of purpose, on purpose, so that God’s purpose will finish its work in us to full completion!
Jeremiah 29:11; Romans 8:28; John 8:32; Philippians 1:6, Deuteronomy 30:15-20;
John 10:1; 1 John 3:1; Hebrews 13:8; Hebrews 13:15; Isaiah 43:19; Ephesians 3:20-21;
Genesis 50:20; Song of Solomon 2:4; Psalm 5:3; Philippians 4:6-7; Matthew 6:25-34
Destiny Walking 